Inversions

by Pacificaä

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    Photography by Sam Mitchell

     

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about

Today is an exciting day, because the final post-production of the album I recorded over break is being completed, meaning it is finally done. I am both excited and nervous, and have been unable to think of much else today (and am still waiting for the phone call from the studio, which means there is still the chance a freak fire could burn it down and I would lose my work). The last week I have been without a single audio copy of the album, so I am excited to hear it with fresh ears and decide if I made something worthwhile or something that completely sucks.

At any rate, the title of the album is "Inversions" and the name I choose to record under is "Pacificaä." I choose this recording name because it fit with the theme under which the music itself was recorded. Firstly, the Pacific Ocean obviously is representative, to some degree, of my new home, and my experience swimming in the ocean earlier this semester was fairly spiritual/revelatory and I have had many vivid dreams about it. Secondly, there is water in the ocean, and there are many water references on this cd, lyrically and musically. Finally, Pacific does in the end mean peaceful, which has absolutely nothing to do with the cd, but I decided to add a level of pretentiousness by giving Pacifica (already a band name, according to Myspace) the extra "ä," thereby demanding people take the music really really seriously (something of a joke, I suppose, although I am a very pretentious person).

I will, at a later point, write a lengthy note regarding the process by which one records an album in one's basement. Until then, here is the track-listing, which would be exciting if the album were being released following live performances of (any of) the songs, but is actually meaningless instead.

Pacificaä- "Inversions"

1. Airlift-Foundation
2. Render (Section 5)
3. In Waves
4. Chernobyl, Part 1
5. Viper (Section 18)
6. The River and the Sea
7. Navigator
8. The Leviathans (Connect Revision)
9. Tundra
10. Chernobyl, Part 2

Here is what we can decipher from this tracklisting:

1. I have ripped off Neutral Milk Hotel and named two songs the same thing, with one being part 1 and the other part 2.

2. I have ripped off Radiohead and placed pretentious and seemingly meaningless additional song titles in parentheses.

3. I have a hyphenated first track, which is actually two songs on one track, but they blend together into one song.

4. I have followed through on my promise to name a song "The River and the Sea," which I have been promising myself I should do since spring 2007.

5. I have mysteriously given two songs "Section" numbers. There is a reason for this. When writing portions of those two songs, I was in need of some sort of heavy guitar riff. I recorded myself playing guitar for an extended period of time (like 15 minutes) while I fiddled around with heavy guitar riffs. The most important parts of each song (the bridge of Render and the coda of Viper) came from this session, with the 5th guitar part played being incorporated into Render and the 18th (there were 21 total "sections") being used in Viper.

6. Track 8, The Leviathans, is not the same song as a 2008 song I wrote called The Leviathan, which was performed by Inverness (www.myspace.com/invernessmusica) and was 10 minutes long. This new version of the track, however, is made up entirely of parts from other songs I have written, all the way back to freshmen year of high school. These other songs include The Cathedral, Connect, and a few tracks I made demos of during Freshmen-Sophomore summer.

7. The oldest song on the album is Tundra, which was written in the fall of 2005.

8. The song Navigator originally was titled Navigator-Locomotive, but the portion of the song known as Locomotive was dropped, and along with it the references to trains. Since track 3 mentions trains in depth, this was eliminated to avoid confusion.

I'll post the lyrics because I'm bored.

I don't know when I'll be able to give copies to people, but it should be in the next 2 weeks at the most.

Take care.
Dan

credits

released January 28, 2009

Recorded and Mixed by Dan Evans
Mastered by Habilis Record in Missoula, MT

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Music by Dan Evans.

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Track Name: airlift-foundation
Airlift

Sparkling cider on New Years
Feeds it oh so well
But I know the feeling
That brings you to your knees

Where is it you go
When you’re next to me?
But I know the feeling
That shatters both my knees

And I don’t want to
Be wrong, so
I will never sleep again
And I don’t want to
Be wrong, I can’t bear to watch

Foundation

All the emptiness I feel
Gets worse when you are gone
You eat me like a parasite
Dissolving me inside

You eat me like a parasite
But still you’re there inside

Now liar, turn all you know
You’ll find them, what is there inside.

Now liar, turn all you will find
I’ll eat you, you will stay inside

I think I
Just might have
Lost all of
My friends.
Track Name: render (section 5)
Awake to the Dark
The corridor
Water rushing in through the hole
A blow to the head
The siren
Water rushing in
All the things when you were young
Well you don’t see them no more
They buried them along
With the pets you had

And now I see the screen
And focus on the point
Of entry,
Into a foreign vessel

I want the same
I did before
I want the same

Can you hear the static?
Well I can’t hear a thing.
Deep in concentration
Blacking out

Waves crashing, lungs caving in
Blood cooling, eyes only seeing
You holding me under
Heart stopping
It’s the same and
Now crashing lungs needing air
Blood rupture, eyes only seeing
You holding me under
Heart breaking

Traitorous
You found a way

I don’t know the origin
But I will find the cure
To this new thing
Inside your body

And can you hear the static?
I can’t feel a thing
Imposter
I call you

Failure

The tide is changing

Like hope,
Like holding on
You know, you know so well
Like home,
Where will you go?
I know, I know so well

I want the same
I did before
I want the same

Can you hear the static?
Well I don’t feel a thing.
Deep in concentration
Falling down

Waves crashing, lungs caving in
Blood cooling, eyes only seeing
You holding me under
Heart stopping
It’s the same and
Now crashing lungs needing air
Blood rupture, eyes only seeing
You holding me under
Heart breaking

Traitorous
Track Name: in waves
A trail of string to help me find my way home
Held in your hands while the wind pulled me west
And I don’t give a thought to my new destination

You seem in motion more than you’re comfortable
And pushing forward, the train has derailed up ahead

Boilermaker I need to behold you
Dig through the mountains and we can go home

You seem in motion more than you’re comfortable
And pushing forward the train has derailed up ahead

There will be snow coming
There will be snow coming
You will be taken by surprise
In the mountains.
Track Name: chernobyl, part 1
When the admiral arrived
He dug through your arteries
Pulled out the plaque
With its plasma defenses
Made haste through your ventricles
Veered through the chambers
And searched for a cure to
What makes you seem dead.
And the boy in the center
I asked him to leave
While I rented the studio
Apartment upstairs

There is so much confusion
Tell me what is happening
Something has poisoned
The water supply
Radiation is leaking out
All of your beautiful
Complex discretions
That only I hear
And the boy in the center
Transmits 24/7
White noise erupting
And consuming

Breaking down
Falling out
Giving up
You can’t fight the things that
Are coming so easy
Like you’re not

The night time makes it so much worse.

You took off the wheels
To start going places
But somehow cement blocks
Don’t let you go far
I ran to the building
Where you went to school
And lay on the track
Til the season would start
And the boy in the center
Does interval repeats
And hurdles the barriers
Inside my head
I am slow but am so tired
Of six minute miles
And I sprint to your bedroom
And turn the lights off

I can’t sleep normal
I don’t see how
Something so beautiful
Makes me feel like this
Again. . .

Why don’t you stop?
Why don’t you end this?
Why don’t you end everything?
Track Name: viper (section 18)
I sit in this prison cell
With you as my guard
Watching over me
Day and night
And though you have the key
You will keep me inside
I think that you want me around
All for the company you’re seeking

If you find your own
Then I’ll put this hole in my head

Dear my lover
Rush me to the emergency room
I will meet you in the new day coming
Soaking wet with your new home in my bed
And though you’re distant
I am finally starting to cope
I think it’s all out
It’s all ash

It’s all ash

I will take you to the city
Shining with lights all around
You will feel at home
There in the stars
come now kiss me on the head
and give me a smile in the dark
I think that I am in a better place
But…

Back in the north
They are starting a war
They are all who you trusted
When you were so young

Dear my lover
Rush me to the emergency room
I will meet you in the new day coming
Soaking wet with your new home in my bed
And though you’re distant
I am finally starting to cope
I think it’s all out
It’s all ash

If you find your own
Then I’ll put this hole in my head

What a waste.
Track Name: the river and the sea
Take the pictures
From the walls
They only feed the
Pressure in my chest.
Hide the evidence
And burn the manuscripts
Til we cannot remember
Where we came from.

Now follow
My hands and eyes are tired
I just long to be released
Now follow
I will give you all I am
If just to be released.

Swiftly flowing
Through the channel
The water rushes
To the sea.
The river swells up
The river hides itself
In someone’s arms
Where it will not be seen .

Now follow
My hands and eyes are tired
I just long to be released
Now follow
I will give you all I am
If just to be released.

But still
But still
It will eat me
But still
But still
It will eat everything

Don’t come near me
I will destroy you
Everything is over

Fold the pages
Take notes in the
Margins you can still
Feel what you’re missing.
For just one time
I will attain it
Finally everything I want
Is everything I need to breathe.

Now follow
My hands and eyes are tired
I just long to be released
Now follow
I will give you all I am
If just to be released.

But still
But still
It will eat everything

Don’t come near me
I will destroy you
Everything is over
Track Name: navigator-locomotive
The coast is clear.
It is dissolving
You are the acid called the sea
That makes the shore retreat.
I am your organs
You are the body that I serve
I will not fail you
You will be supported

Trim the sails
Fire up the rockets
Push the pedal to the
Floorboard of the automobile
I will drive you
Until the liquids start to move
And then I’ll clear up
All the stormclouds in the system

We’re going to drown if
We don’t pick another one. . . No,
Don’t pick another one
This is upside down

Pressure Up
Supply dwindling
We will have to take some
Desperate measures to survive

We’re going to drown if
We don’t pick another one. . . No,
Don’t pick another one
This is upside down

He is the vessel
You are the artifact
Let him inside you
Soon you will feel empty like the sea.
Track Name: the leviathans (connect revision)
Do you mean to state
You were hardly noticing
The motions of your body
As a tool for the night?
But you captivate your prey
With a self-defacing smile
Pushing venom into veins
Of the countless helpless boys

While waiting for someone to take you away
Your knight won’t have any shining armor. I think
He will drink himself and you into the center of the earth
And keep you at bay every night with god upon his fists and

I burn up
I come back down
We want you here with us
Until we fall apart.

You lived out of town
And the city it refused
To inhabit your body
For a single instant
And you still dream at night
Of a love so childish
And hang your halo on the bedpost
Like your grandmother

Just because you feel safe in your bedroom
Does not mean no one wants inside

I burn up
I come back down
We want you here with us
Until we fall apart.

The trade winds carry forth
From your home to the Atlantic
You still wear it in the title
That your parents gave you
You can hear the wind at night
We will name it for your lover
And a cyclone loses strength
Beyond the confines of the sea.
Track Name: tundra
The lid, it bottled me up
I was waiting in the corridor so long
And you didn’t even see me
I know what you did last night
And you greet me with the door held halfway shut
No I don’t want to see it
You know you’re faster than i
You’re never losing strength on all the hard parts
And so I limp along
And all this scouting ahead
But if I see you next time on the other side
It will be forgiven

Do I close doors?
Do I offer more than all the others,
Or am I only kidding myself?
And when you get back
Can we be friends?
I know it’s been a long time
I know it’s been

I’ve tried to make water wine
But I can’t give the miracle I want
More than any other
I tore it out in a blink
Tore open a white envelope that bore
The place of your origin
You know I will be your friend
I will lay here in your brother’s room
While you nap next to me, we are the same
But not a moment too soon
I know you better than you know the one you are becoming

Do I close doors?
Do I offer more than all the others,
Or am I only kidding myself?
And if you make it back,
Can we be friends?
I know it’s been a long time
I know it’s been the same

What is it you are wanting?
I will give you everything I have
Track Name: chernobyl, part 2
Now, the sea
Still beckons me in
It calls me at night
I can hear it. . .



It’s not so bad
It’s different than you think
It’s not so bad
It’s different than you think

I walk through the door
I turn all the lights off
You will never see the look on my face
I park by the road
And stare at the freeway exit
I don’t think I can drive anymore

I walk through the door
I turn all the lights off
Lover, can’t you please just go back to sleep. . .

I know I can’t win
You’re far away from here
And lately he is all you want

And I am not.